Once , when my boys were little , the power went out.
My oldest says; At least we've got the microwave ( hot pockets ).
My youngest looked at me increduously and him and I broke out laughing
How do you complement a Lakota woman ?
Nice tooth !
A young man and his father are standing on a hillside overlooking a valley and his father waves his arm and says: someday , all of this won't be yours.
Ex ~ Prez Bill Clinton called Donald and said I will always be remembered as " the guy who banged an intern " , how is that ? {" Luck of the Irish "}
My boss {25 yr ago} taught his daughter a game to humor himself and others who visited.
He would say: Jump and she would say: How high ?
He would say : Shit and she would say : what color ?
Did not make momma happy
Right out of
high school , I worked making containers/boxes and George , my boss needed to renew his driver's license .
As he was walking into Sec of State to do so . . . He took visual of vehicle/noted particulars.
When the lady checked his peripheral vision he didn't say anything until it was almost behind him . . . Which made her ask: You can see that ? [ to which he explained to her , yes ( described car behind him ) ]
LOL ROFL
The one about the woman who never consumated her marriage ?
The first time was a muslim and against his faith
The second time she married a republican and he just sat on the bed and told her how good it was going to be
Nurse: "There's a man in the waiting room who says he's invisible."
Doctor: "Tell him I can't see him today."
Doctor sends nurse into patient's room for a procedure.
Patient runs out of room screaming bloody murder.
Doctor says "I told you to prick his boyle not boil his prick!"
They might say "don't try this at home" but nothing about not trying it at your friend's house.